The Sample

The end of the story is that we got the urine sample.

We took Freddy to the Belgian doc at the Belgian embassy on Tuesday afternoon. The awesome folks at IJM gave us a ride. The visit was great – very thorough – but it was straight from a PBS documentary on health in Africa. Just one small room with the doctor. No waiting room, no nurses, no receptionist. I now know how to say nasal congestion in French. I still have no idea how to convert pounds to kilos or Farenheit to Celsius.

The doctor diagnosed an infection but wanted to check his urine. He sent us home to collect a urine sample. Apparently you can purchase from a pharmacy a small baggie that you tape over the baby’s unmentionables and leave it in the diaper. You try and explain that to the pharmacist in Kinyarwanda (the language here) and let me know how it goes. I can save you the trouble – the ladies burst out laughing every time someone gestured to or mentioned the baby’s nether-region.

So, we were left with a DIY project. Alas, no Pinterest board for this one. Thus began the vigil of stripping Freddy naked and holding a cup, waiting for the flow to come. For the last six months, until Tuesday, every single time you took off the boy’s diaper, you were guaranteed to elicit a sample. The boy likes the fresh air.

We dipped his toes in cold water and warm water. We tickled him. We talked about running water. Nothing. Dry as this Rwandan weather we are having.

With the 4 pm Wednesday fast approaching, we were getting desperate. I read online that babies pee a lot in their sleep. He fell asleep, we took off the diaper and waited. I gave up and sat down for lunch with our roommates. At around 1:00 pm, BB sticks his head into the dining room and holds out the cup. He did it!

For anyone out there who wants to know the secret (since I googled this question, maybe someone else will to). If you want to get a baby boy to pee, just drip a little cold water on the tip of his p***s while he’s sleeping. Works every time.

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